Tea and Cake.

LAD.

2012-01-05T08:18:00.000-08:00

Scrolling through social networking sites daily, I've noticed a subculture forming and it wasn't until recently I found out the name for it...LAD.

Suddenly it's become acceptable for men to talk about women in a completely derogatory way, in what is supposed to be irony. I understand that these comments are supposed to be banter, but I'm just not getting it.

It's not that I don't have a sense of humour, I can see the funny side. Who doesn't love a bit of banter? But when it becomes offensive and you can no longer see the line between somebody having a laugh and genuinely disgusting comments then as a feminist and even just as a female, I have to object.

You can't expect me or any other women to take these comments as a joke, just because you or someone else has added...'LAD'. I thought the whole 'lad' culture died a death a while ago, of course in Essex it never really does, but still.

If anything it makes me completely lose respect for the culprits, who are usually really sweet guys in real life. What if I suddenly turned the tables and came out with crude comments about men, people would judge me in an instant. As it has been in our society for some time...it's one rule for the men, another for the women.

Whether you're a man or a woman, I believe you need to have respect for others and yourself. It is your decision what you do in life and I try not to judge others, but it's how you carry yourself that is important.

I'm not being an uptight feminist, those who know me are aware that I'm a new wave feminist and I don't hate men. I'm not militant about my beliefs. I have my views, I like to debate and educate. I just believe that in this day and age, things are still not equal between the sexes and some things need to be rectified.

I don't understand why these comments are funny or acceptable, feel free to explain to me why you can class it as 'banter' and why it is OK to talk that way. If we were talking about race, sexuality or disability would it be acceptable?

New Year

2012-01-02T11:06:00.000-08:00

I'm sorry I've neglected this blog so much, it's been an odd 5 months. Since finishing uni and my graduation, I've been working a lot and trying to sort my life out. Alas, I'm still not a full time professional journalist, but I do begin a two month internship in a week and I have had freelance work every few months. I'll get there...hopefully sooner than later.

Meanwhile, a new year has begun and I'm making some resolutions and goals. The start of the year always scares me, I can never imagine where I'll be by the end of it. So much can happen in a year, and that opening of possibility always scares me. Especially at this time of my life when anything could happen.

By the end of the year, I want to be in a professional job and in my own place. Two big goals but something I need and want to achieve. I am not one of these people that can just let life pass them by, I need to achieve things and reach my goals. I can't sit waiting for life to begin, I need to make it happen.

Along with life goals, the year brings the typical new year diet. This year however, I actually intend to stick to it. I need to take better care of myself, inside and out.

I also intend to pay more attention to this blog, it's been an odd relationship. I have been slack and I will rectify this. I need to write more, I need to keep in practise and I need to vent my many thoughts on something other than Twitter.

As for love, who knows. It's one of those unpredictable things, and I've come to a point in my life where I have no expectations. I'm so used to near misses, let downs and the single life that I'm no longer bothered either way. And that's a place I've had to get to for years. I can laugh instead of cry, and I'm a stronger person because of it. In some ways, being single during these vital years has made me who I am and independent and strong because of it. I don't need anyone except myself. And those who I do have, I am all the more thankful for.

2011 had it's ups and downs, and I'm a better and stronger because of it.

These whole 'New Year, new me' blogs are so cliche, but I have a genuine good feeling and I want it to be an important year for me. I have good intentions and hopes and I can't wait to get started.

Happy New Year folks, let's not leave it so long next time.

And now, the end is near.

2011-09-05T12:19:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow I graduate university, and it feels too soon.

I don't want to be officially pushed out into the real world, it's scary. For seventeen years of my life, I've had an educational establishment to fall back on every September. To look forward and plan for, with a routine and a set path. I knew where I was going! I wanted to be a journalist, I had since I started high school and now I've got the qualifications and experience to do it, it's just getting there.

University was always sold as 'the best years of your life', and in some ways it was. The freedom was euphoric. We drank, we danced, we had silly inside jokes and stayed up til the small hours. In fact, while I think about it now, so much happened in those three quick years and I have so many memories to take with me. Some of the adventures I had, people I met and lessons I learnt were important parts of my time there.

I had the best of times, and I had the worst of times. I made friends, I lost friends. And maybe I was never quite fully understood, and things didn't end as I hoped but it's over now and it's the way it goes.

To think that tomorrow I will be in graduation gown and cap, with a crowd of people I shared those memories with, in the city I lived them, for possibly the last ever time is surreal, sad and scary. I've worked so hard, and it all comes down to this. I can be proud of myself and know...

I did it my way.

Goodbye class of 2011.

Tears dry on their own.

2011-07-24T03:49:00.000-07:00

I'm sitting here listening to Amy Winehouse, and it still hasn't really sunk in that Amy's gone. When I heard the news of Amy's death yesterday, it stopped me in my tracks. A true musical legend of my generation, I've followed her career since the Brits praised her for Frank back in 2003.

It seems so unfair that we have lost so many fantastic pop culture icons because of drugs and alcohol. What is it about these substances that entice people into throwing their lives away? Back to Black pushed Amy into the public eye, and sold millions. It's a perfect, timeless album, that I could listen to again over and over again. There is so much soul, hurt and emotion on that album, that we believe every word Amy sings. She put on a hard front, but those lyrics could only come from true vulnerability.

As we watched her fall into that spiral of drugs and alcohol, lost and confused on newspaper pages, stumbling and mumbling through performances, we willed her to take control and recover. She never really did, and I believe the 'right' people around her tried to save her, but it was Amy's decision and in the end, her final one was her last.

We'll never really know what was going through her mind yesterday. I just hope the negative influencers in her life, that introduced her to that world, know what they did.

In some respect, we always suspected it would end like this, but never hoped it would. I never knew her, but through her lyrics I felt like in some way I did. Listen to her music and keep it alive, and show Amy respect. No matter what your opinion on Amy, someone still died, a family is grieving.

Goodbye Amy. I hope you found the peace you needed.

We only said goodbye with words...

Waiting...

2011-06-27T13:25:00.000-07:00

I have one week until I find out if the last three long years of university were worth it.

Just thinking about it is increasing my heartbeat. I'm truly terrified. I feel I've worked hard, and tried my hardest these past three years, but I have the usual nagging fear that my grades might not be good enough...that I'll get a 2:2 instead of a 2:1. A difference of a grade could mean weeping or whooping and it makes me feel physically sick.

I almost completely lost my mind in my third year, with all the work and stress. I hope it was worth it. If you'd like to see the website I created with my group members Rachel Dalton and Lucy Smith, you can find it here or the accompanying website for the vintage lifestyle magazine I created (by myself I may add), it is here.

On top of that I had a dissertation and business of journalism coursework to do. Word to the wise, be prepared for third year, the workload is huge, so schedule yourself!

I suppose all I can do is hope, I've tried my hardest and there isn't anything more I can do this next week, except wait...

I don't want kids ok?

2011-02-09T02:36:00.000-08:00

Hello!
I'm sorry it's been a while, but I have an insane amount of uni work to do. Third year is a bitch of epic proportions. Then if I'm not doing that I'm procrastinating or sleeping.

OK, so today's blog is a bit of a rant. I often find myself in feminist arguments with my largely non-feminist flatmates. But I find myself in the same argument with a lot of people; flatmates, family and mostly mother.

It seems, in the 21st century, where women are more powerful than ever, working their way up the career ladder, running businesses and generally taking over the world, it is still taboo for a women not to have that maternal gene.

If a woman declares she doesn't want children, she is looked at in shock and if she's young like me, told she'll change her mind. Is it almost impossible for people to understand why a woman would rather have a great career than a house, a husband and 2.4 children.

Don't get me wrong, I like children, I adore my niece and nephew. However, I have no desire to have children of my own. Selfish it may be, but I don't have the time, patience or energy. The best thing about other people's children is that I can give them back.

My life ambitions are more focused around getting a great career than getting married and having children. I want to achieve a great position on a magazine, and that takes time, energy and commitment. I don't want to have to take off maternity leave and risk my job. I don't want to hardly see my kids or form no real relationship with them, because I'm never there.

It is possible to be a powerful woman and have children, there are editors of women's magazines with children. I'm not saying you can't have one without the other. You can. But I want the freedom to do what I want, when I want to. If I have the offer of a trip to New York, I want to be able to take it.

I could never be a woman that gives up her freedom and job for a man. I've worked hard my entire life and I don't intend on spending my days cooking, cleaning and greeting my husband when he gets in from work. It would send me insane.

As much as I enjoy expensive things, I don't think I'd be content with being a kept woman, it would get incredibly boring. I wouldn't want to have to rely on a man. Surely there is more joy in working hard, saving money and buying something great for yourself. That sense you earned it, rather than owe someone.

Who knows. Maybe everyone will be right, and I may end up with children. But for now, I really can't see it. It's never been a desire of mine to have children. It is possible for a woman not to have that desire, and she shouldn't be demonised for it. It doesn't make her heartless, it just makes her different. Times have changed, and women should be able to feel like they're life is still fulfilled if they don't have children or a husband.

As long as a woman is happy with life, should it matter? A man isn't demonised for not wanting children. I hope to find a man that doesn't expect out of date conventions from me. Women have brains and are capable of making their own decisions. I shouldn't have to say "Oh you want a child? OK, I'll have one, my hearts not in it, but sure...I'll give up my life if that's what you want."

Call me selfish and heartless, but it's my decision if I decide to pro-create.

Feminism: A dirty word?

2010-10-06T13:36:00.000-07:00

I feel I've been boring my peers a lot with my feminist rants lately, but the complete lack of enthusiasm by women to open their eyes to feminist issues is shocking.

It seems after we won the vote and campaigned for equal pay, most women believed the job of feminists had been done, and to carry on the fight in the 21st century was pointless and radical. After all, what is there left to fight for?

Feminists are still perceived as hairy legged man hating ranters, who are scary and odd, and not one to engage in conversation. I can see people cringe when I mention I'm a feminist, as they conjure up these images.

I do not have to compromise who I am to be a feminist, I'm a dedicated follower of fashion, I swoon over unsuitable guys and sometimes (shock horror) I show a bit of leg.

During a discussion with friends after a night out, I mentioned how a guy had grabbed my arse, and how I was appalled and would of punched him, had I not had my hands full with drinks as I navigated myself out of a bar queue.

I was told 'what did I expect' as I was dressed in shorts and knee high socks. I argued that I could dress provocatively if I wished, and not have to worry about getting goosed.

It seems young women who have benefited from the work of past generations of women, simply accept these new rights we have as the norm, and are quite willing to accept the social inequalities we still face today.

Women are still not paid equally in Britain, despite the equal pay act the feminists fought so hard for. Thankfully gagging orders about male colleague's salaries have recently been lifted, making it illegal for companies to hide what individuals are being paid. So while the fight is still far from over, we're getting closer.

My point is, among students, where opinions and political activism should be at their highest, many women are simply happy to sit back and accept the situation.

Is it fair that some men still think it is acceptable to view us as sex objects that they have unprecedented access to?

Is it right that there are women who will answer to their boyfriend's every word and caution?

Is it okay that some women will dress provocatively purely for the chance to please men?

Should we accept the undertone of most popular music, selling sex to sell female artists?

We have a lot to thank feminists for; without the suffragettes we wouldn't have votes, without first wave feminists we wouldn't have equal pay and equal job opportunities.

Next time you sneer at feminism, think about it.

The summer where I didn't stop.

2010-07-25T11:34:00.000-07:00

It really has been a mad few months, which sort of justifies my lack of blogging. Well, that's my story and I'm sticking to it...

First there was New York, which was truly amazing. I've also been working a lot to raise some holiday dosh, and then I had my work experience at the local paper. And now I have more work experience at my grandparent's local paper.

The best thing about the work experience I've had, is that it proved to me that this career path I've been following for ten years, is the right one for me. I felt so at home in the Newsroom, and it's important for me to land in a job, where I can get up for work everyday, excited to see what the day will bring.

Maybe that job satisfaction won't last forever, who knows? Yet at this moment in time, its new and exciting and I know that I want to be a journalist. Being able to write everyday and get paid for it, is my dream job. I really hope I achieve it, and maybe end up writing at a top women's magazine in New York....if somehow the world goes mad, and I get lucky.

Meanwhile, I will soon be jetting off to Florida to soak up the sun, and scream my head off. Oh and lots of shopping. Even after New York, I am yet to be bored of it. If there are pretty clothes, I'm there. Maybe I can make it as a stylist or personal shopper if journalism doesn't work out?

I heart New York.

2010-06-26T13:17:00.000-07:00

Here is a blog post I wrote a while ago, and never posted because my computer crashed. Its half finished, but worth a publish...

I am currently suffering the post New York trip blues. Last week I was exploring the wonderful city of New York, today I am in Essex, bored out of my brain.

I think I've found my spiritual home, it's like I'm meant to be there, as if it was designed for me. It's given me my ultimate life goal, get an excellent journalism job at a fantastic exciting magazine in New York. Hmm, sounds easy enough...

Its grid system, the endless shops, the beautiful scenery, the people and how at home it made me, all made it steal my heart. I'm determined to make it my home one day. I don't feel right at all now I'm back in Blighty. Normal everyday life just doesn't cut it.

I did so much shopping in New York, and lets not be mistaken, its not as if theres a shortage of them there. From Century 21 to American Eagle to Abercrombie and Fitch, I was in my element, and my wardrobe has seen some fantastic new editions. Lets just say I'm set for t-shirts and I have some gorgeous dresses I can dress up or down. Perfect.

A highlight to the shopping experience is stepping into Abercrombie and Fitch and coming face to face with a shirtless male model. I think every shopping experience should start like this. Getting to side up to a young gorgeous man and get a polaroid as a souviner lightens up any day. So much so, I collected three.

Another excellent highlight was my trip down Bleeker Street, that took me to Carrie's steps from Sex and the City. An important experience for all SATC fans, and a stark reminder how much I'd give for Carrie Bradshaw's life. Just minutes later, I found myself at Magnolia Bakery, another important SATC landmark and the best cupcakes ever. For a cupcake enthusiast, an important landmark. I invested in the red velvet with cream, a bright red cupcake with sweet creamy buttercream covering the top. If journalism doesn't work out, I will be starting my own cake shop, its my only other passion.

5th Avenue reminded me that I need to make a lot of money, so I can afford gorgeous designer garments. The affect the have on me is pure passion, and it breaks my heart that I can't afford them.

Girl Power.

2010-05-03T15:30:00.000-07:00

Hello, yes I've been missing for ages. I'm very sorry, I'm a bad blogger. But now my uni assignments are over, and I have a summer of New York and Florida to look forward to, my blog should be a lot less boring. I promise.

Now, on to today's topic. Feminism has always been a passion of mine, from admiring the Spice Girls back in nineties to standing up for my beliefs today. I feel it is so important for women to stand up tall and fight for their rights.

We've been through a lot in the last 100 years, from fighting for the vote to fighting for equal pay, we will not stop fighting until we are treated equally. You may think women have nothing left to fight for; we're in high paid jobs, becoming millionaires and taking over politics. Yet women are still paid on average 80% less than men. In 2010, surely this can't be right or fair?

I have always aimed for the top, even as a child. I always wanted to be best in class, and end up in a successful job that was my dream. That dream turned into journalism, and I'm going to keep striving for it until I get it. I will ignore those that tell me I can't, but take on board the advice I am I given, we all learn somewhere.

In the words of Destiny's Child, I'm an independent woman. I have been single for longer than I care to remember, but I won't let it get me down. I don't need a man to make me feel complete. I hear so many girls saying they can't do things because they're worried what their boyfriend will think, or he will get jealous, or he doesn't like it. Since when do you let a man tell you what to do?
At the risk of scaring off any chance of getting a boyfriend ever, I could never imagine myself adhering to some man, and doing what he says. I know relationships need compromise, I understand that, but if I don't agree, it's not happening.

If you want to go out with the girls and get drunk, do it. You don't have to phone and text him, keeping him updated on every minute of your whereabouts. He does not own you, you are your own person.

Feminism is not about burning bras and hating men. You can be a girlie girl, you can care about your appearance and you can fancy bad boys. The main point is, your thinking for yourself. What you do, you do for you.

I'm proud to be a women, it's great. I love how far we've come. I love how amazing, pretty and great we all are. We've come a long way, but there is still a way to go. Girls, feminism is not a dirty word, stand up for your beliefs. Many women fought for that for us.

Yes I'm still alive.

2009-12-30T11:59:00.001-08:00

In case any of you were wondering if I'd fallen off the face of the planet, I'd like to inform you that I'm still alive and kicking.

The months between September and December were a complete blur. I'm now the deputy style editor of The Linc, my university's newspaper. So on top of a complete overload of university coursework, I've had that to contend with. Year two is a right slap in the face, how I'll deal with my third is beyond me.

However despite my complete lack of free time, I've enjoyed meeting new people and making new friends. I love being part of something I'm proud of, check out www.thelinc.co.uk to see our work.

So as the new year (and a new decade) beckons, it's promotes a feeling of nostalgia among us all. I can't believe I'm seeing my second decade in, and my teenage years will come to an end in May. However, I act like an OAP anyway, so getting old is nothing to worry about.

I think come May I will write a blog about how my teenage years have passed me by without a my first love, that I dreamed about in so many Sarra Manning novels. 2009 has yet again not been my year, but this is the year I got almost used to it. However, I will not be complacent.

Instead I'm dreaming big, this year my mum wanted to go to Australia and she did it. It's prompted me to do the same, I want go to New York, and I'm going to do it. Saving money has never ever been my strong point, but I need to go on an adventure and for a single journalist, New York is the ideal. Perhaps as product of watching too much 'Sex and the city' and romantic comedies, but New York seems like the place to me. Shopping anyone?

I've always championed women being strong and independent, that we don't have to flaunt ourselves and mess with our looks to get somewhere in the world. That with intelligence alone, we can achieve want we want and take opportunities.

It doesn't always work that way, I know the world doesn't. But it should. This year I let men get me down, and make me feel bad about myself. I let myself feel worthless because I wasn't what they wanted, and because I yet again met myself with unrequited love.

Next year, I'm going to try hard to not let that happen again. Women, we are strong and independent, we don't need men to determine how we feel about ourselves. If we don't love ourselves, nobody will. Yes, its psychiatric bullshit, but maybe some positive thinking in this depressing climate will give us all a kick up the arse.

I'm working tomorrow night, so another anticlimactic new years is on the cards, but here's to 2010 and many more opportunities.

Next year, I'm going to try to live my life to the full. My own way.

RIP Michael Jackson

2009-06-25T15:59:00.000-07:00

I was planning to write a new blog on here, now that marking is over. But I didn't expect it to be under these circumstances. Here I was all ready to rant about my ridiculous love life, then news breaks that Michael Jackson has died, after suffering a cardiac arrest.

Its the kind of news, that you can't quite believe. The kind that takes a while to sink in. I know I didn't know him personally, but there are so many people in the world, that are going to be affected by this news. We all have our own opinions about his personal life, but there is no denying that he was one of the most important things to happen to music. He was an icon, a legend, and he has inspired so much of the music that is in our charts today.

I grew up in the 90s with his music being played in my house. He's had a career that's spanned 5 decades, and is one of the most recognisable icons in pop. You cannot deny his music is amazing, albums such as Thriller and Bad will go down as important music milestones. He was only 51 years old, I thought he had decades left. His health suffered many blows over the years, but I don't think anyone expected it would come to this.

I was due to see MJ in February during his massive tour at the O2. I was so excited, finally getting my chance to see the King of Pop live. The man has such aura and such a legendary status, I didn't know what to expect, but I knew it would be exciting. I had feelings something would go wrong, that I wouldn't get to see him. But I didn't think he would die. I thought he was invincible.

My thoughts are with his children, his family and friends. But lets not forget the fans, who are also suffering. So many will be affected by this news.

I am deeply saddened by the news, he was a crucial part of my musical education. He introduced me to so many amazing songs, and I couldn't help by be in awe of his dancing, his stage presence, his outfits. Now that his life has ended, we know that the fifty years he had, were hugely eventful, and he had an amazing life. Through ups and downs, he has had the support of his family and fans. Now in death, he will never be forgotten.

But it disappoints me so so much, that I will now not to see him at the O2. It sounds selfish, it sounds silly, when a man has lost his life. But I wanted to be part of history, I wanted to see him on that stage doing what he does best. I can't help but feel bitter that it won't happen now. There are rumours that we won't get refunds. Most likely vicious rumours to generate anger, but if true, I think its completely disgusting. Though we are all saddened by his death, we shouldn't have to pay for a show we will never get to see.

I'm really going to miss this man. I don't care about peoples opinions and allegations. He was an important musical icon, and he will never be replaced. During the somewhat, more sensible hours of today, I'm going to devote my time to listening to his timeless tunes, and try and let the news sink in.

Its a really sad day. Rest in peace, Michael Jackson. A complete and utter legend.

Sex and TV.

2009-03-26T05:17:00.000-07:00

Today it was reported that under new proposals, restrictions on condom advertisements would be relaxed and information from the Pregnancy Advisory Services could be advertised on television.

This is long overdue, we cannot afford to be reserved about these things. It seems the government is finally understanding this, that every effort has to be made to try and reduce teenage pregnancies. That is not to say that teenage mothers aren't good parents. I know many young mothers that do an amazing job, but there is an epidemic in this country.

Teenagers need to be educated in the importance of using condoms. There is so much ignorance going on amongst young people and we can't afford to let it happen. We already have advertisements for condoms on television but these are only on channel four and most are after the 9pm watershed. Yet these advertisements convey an important message. Two of recent relevance refer to the use of condoms to prevent STIs (Condom: Essential Wear) and the 'Want Respect, Use a condom' campaign. The respect campaign involved teenagers the morning after a sexual encounter spilling the details to their friends, and how when they revealed the didn't use a condom they lost respect from their peers.

I think its important to get hard hitting messages like this out into the open. I was lucky enough to have good sex education at my school, but not all students are as lucky. Also, it is easy for pupils to take the lesson as a joke and laugh with their peers. We know that the majority of young people use the television as their main information outlet, and this is where they get most of their sexual knowledge from. Yet in television dramas, how often do we see anybody use a condom? How often do they get pregnant or contract STIs? It happens, but not often.

The pregnancy advice services advertising would also include information about abortions. There is no doubt that this will cause much debate amongst pro-life supporters but that option needs to be out there. These advertisements wouldn't promote abortion, they would just face women with another choice.

I really hope these proposals go ahead. In Europe, sex is much more out in the open and their rate of teenage pregnancies are nowhere near as high as our own. Further education about sex to young audiences and openness is our society is the only way anything will ever change. Sex is everywhere we look, so what is the problem with providing further knowledge to the young?

Rule Britannia!

2009-03-23T08:11:00.000-07:00

With the excitement of the Brits last month and i-D doing a 'Best of British' issue (which is arguably their best issue yet) it got me thinking about this small island and it's inhabitants.

I really do love this country, however I think as a nation we have a difficulty finding our inner patriotism. We are a nation with poor self confidence, constantly highlighting our flaws and standing in the shadow of America. But we're GREAT Britain for a reason.

Travelling on public transport is the best chance to get a real snapshot of the country. With nothing to do but flick through a magazine and avoid staring at people, you really get to observe your fellow passengers. The majority of British passengers will sit and keep themselves to themselves, which is another little characteristic I love. Yeah its slightly rude and unsociable, but its also an excellent example of how we are a reserved country. I think its a good thing, who wants to sit next to some stranger and hear them spill out their entire personal life. Sometimes travelling can just be an excellent excuse to rest. Yet in this country, you really do get some people that surprise you, those strangers that can bring a smile to your face.

Today while travelling back to Lincoln from a weekend back home, I got the pleasure of a wonderful lovely woman sitting next to me. For anyone thats just been on a demoralising silent journey on the tube and battled through crowds of people at turnstiles and train timetables, it really is a breath of fresh air. Straight away she said hello to me, she didn't judge me because I was young or reading a magazine. Just minutes later she offered to buy me a coffee or tea ( I politely declined) and then she was offering me most of her packet of crisps. You don't see an awful lot of generosity these days, especially with money being as tight as it is, so for somebody to put themselves out to a stranger like that, it really warmed my heart.

The 7/7 bombings really showed how this country teams together in the face of disaster. For tube commuters who would usually ignore one another to help each other in a life or death situation, was a warming example of our commaradary defeating the actions of evil. We team together when it matters and look out for our fellow citizens. It would of been so easy to escape and save yourself and leave the strangers behind, but survivors teamed together and lifes were saved that day.

It's the little things in this country that make me love it so. Yes a lot needs to change, and the weather leaves a lot to be desired. Yet here in this glorious country; a cup of tea solves everything, a Sunday isn't complete without a roast dinner and we have excellent swearwords.

Reasons why it would be quite nice to have a boyfriend.

2009-03-11T06:13:00.000-07:00

I tend to avoid writing blogs about boys. I find it hard enough to pull, without scaring them off.

However, having been single for far too long, and having too much time by myself. I have drummed up some excellent reasons, why having a boypeice around would be rather helpful. Now of course, I'm an independent woman and I don't need a man to make me complete, but there are some things you can't do alone.

Firstly, I would have a man around to do manly jobs, that I'm too weak for. I am highly unfit with pathetic weak arms, which poses a great challenge when I go shopping. I dread ever buying heavy items like potatoes and juice, because walking back feels like a marathon. Every moment, I am paralysed with fear that the weak carrier bag will split because the shop assistant has displayed an amazing ability to fit everything in one bag. In the event I had a boyfriend, he could display his manly ability to carry heavy items. Even in the event it was quite heavy for him, men being men, I highly doubt he would display this and would carry on with the job in hand.

Secondly, it wouldn't be quite so scary walking back from a night out. Walking with a boy means I'm much less likely to get cat calls from weird pervy old men. When left to walk alone in the dark, I walk at the speed of light. This would save an awful lot of leg work if I had a nice gentleman to walk me home. Another quite useful use of a boyfriend, would be as transportation during said night out, when my tiny feet can't take the piercing pain of heels anymore, a piggy back is at hand.

Moving on, there really isn't anything better than a big man hug. Having some nice toned arms around you, feels like the safest and best place in the world. However, this hug would have to require effort, there really isn't anything worse than a half arsed hug.

Most men are also quite good at technical things. While scart leads and the TV menu leave me dreadfully lost, the male species displays an uncanny ability to master these electrical nuisances.

Possibly one of the best reasons would be that I would have an excellent excuse to drive off unwanted male attention from the many weirdos that reside in clubs and bars. Yes, I do realise I can lie and say I'm taken, but I'm an awful liar and it would actually be nice for that to be true for once.

I do realise I'm being very naive, and this mythical boyfriend I've dreamt up rarely exists. However, wouldn't it be nice? Until then, I think I'm going to have to invest in a granny trolley, so buying potatoes doesn't have to be the bane of my life. Yet this purchase may eradicate my chances of attracting the opposite sex altogether.

3 Reasons why men are a complete mystery.

1. There are so many hidden rules- Don't text too much, Don't text til your texted, Play it cool.
2. You pretty much have to treat them like rubbish for them to like you.
3. In the words of Katy Perry- They're hot then they're cold.

Why univeristy is making me old before my years.

2009-03-03T07:18:00.002-08:00

University is seen as the last blow out before a lifetime of working full time and paying taxes. Students are known for constantly getting drunk and partying, and damn the consequences. However, I'm discovering a whole new side that student life is bringing to me. University is making me old.

Okay, my teen years are gradually drawing to a close and now that I don't live with my parents anymore, I naturally have to grow up. But who would of thought, that I would actually care about dust, and polish would be my new best friend? That my flatmates leaving crumbs and spills on the surface would make my blood boil?

I have turned into a prize nagger, frantic post it notes slammed on the offending item, explaining my complete frustration at this act of untidiness! Only for them to be ripped off, minutes later by the flat rebels. Years of cleanliness drummed into me by my mum, taking full effect now shes not here to do it or nag me into submission. Yet my authority has no ground here, there's no blood ties or parental surveillance. My own stubbornness tells me not to do it for them, so as the mess grows, I grow slowly more insane.

When I'm not huffing and puffing over a full sink or crumbs sticking to my bare feet, I'm filling time between lectures. Suddenly getting up in the morning is so much harder, because the call of Phil and Fern is just too tempting. I'm finding myself watching segments on shocking true life stories and fashion advice on This Morning. Then comes the health piece, riddling me with hypochondria.

I have reached middle age prematurely. When I should be living in my own mess, drinking nightly and not giving a damn what I eat, I'm living the opposite. This can only arguably be a good thing; less chance of poisoning myself is a plus. Yet I fear I have already become boring, not that I ever was exciting. Am I set to spend my student days chasing after my messy peers with a dust cloth and antibacterial sprays?

I actually contemplated how I need a feather duster the other day. I need professional help.

Bones

2009-02-27T07:08:00.000-08:00

Photo by Hedi Slimane

What does this image make you think? Lindsay Lohan, the once curvy girl we adored in the movie 'Mean Girls', has swapped her womanly figure for a waif like one. Do you envy her newly thin figure and her tiny waist? Is that something you strive for or does it disgust you?

Women have always been subject to image, constantly striving for what we see as the ideal look of the time. Today we have a divided society, those that hope and dream for the 'perfect' thin figure that mirrors the models on the catwalk and the celebrities in our magazines. Then the opposing team, those happy in their own skin. Campaigning for real beauty.

For any impressionable teenager, which side of the fence do you choose? Gok Wang is telling you to 'Work it girlfriend' and the gossips rags are bombarding you with images of celebrities with 'Shocking weight loss!'. I'm one of many, that are sitting on the fence, teetering either side. For years now I've been campaigning for real beauty and writing articles and blogs about how woman should love themselves whatever they look like, and we shouldn't be striving for this aspiration of thin. At the end of a hard day, it should be our talent that is recognised, not our weight. However, in the society we're living in, is there any escape?

Like most girls in the western world, I'm consumed by image. I worry about what I look like, what I wear, what I weigh. Yet at the same time, I wish with all my heart that girls had self confidence. That we didn't wish we were thinner or taller, and just accepted what we were born with. I'm not going to lie, this is something I have to achieve with the rest of them. I just wonder if this will ever end in modern society.

For all of time, people have had to live up to the accepted status quo. Yet in the here and now, we seem to have gone back generations. It's almost as if we've reverted back to fifties housewives, looking impossibly beautiful for MEN. And at the same time, we're in competition with each other. There is no solidarity or sisterhood, we want to outshine each other and look the best at all times.

I think it's going to be a long battle, but we can win the war. We have got to start loving ourselves. Curvy or waif. Tall or petite. Women are beautiful.

Put some clothes on!

2009-02-21T12:14:00.001-08:00

I have just watched 'The Saturdays' new video for 'Just can't get enough'. While this is for charity and is a relatively catchy cover, I couldn't help but feel appalled at the scantily clad girls. Why is it, that girl groups feel the need to strip off in their videos to sell records? It deeply saddens me that, in what are supposed to be modern times, women are still sex objects.

Shouldn't we be listening to their music, rather than looking at their bodies? Not only does this completely undermine women everywhere, but it does no good for their self esteem. This music is mainly purchased by young teenage girls, what are we teaching them by bombarding them with images of 'perfect' women with 'perfect' bodies?

Girl groups today are Barbie dolls, straight off the manufacturing line. Not a hair out of place, no fat on their body and fawned over by men everywhere. Women want to be them, and men want to be with them. What do these videos teach young girls or any vulnerable young woman? That we should be flashing our bodies to stand any chance of a date? That the girl next door, with the curvy figure and high street clothes who gets bad hair days, should change herself into a sex object, to stand any chance of being noticed?

Do we really live in a society, in which, it is acceptable for girl groups to sell their bodies in order to sell records? Surely by now, the pop industry should know better. The music industry has recently been overrun with female solo singers that are everyday women. Lily Allen, Adele, Kate Nash and Florence and the machine to name a few. These women are talented, but don't compromise their dignity to sell their music.

The Spice Girls took over the nineties with their message of 'Girl Power', they were normal women, from normal backgrounds who weren't afraid to be themselves. Whatever happened to this mantra? Are we destined to be subjected to more and more racy music videos from girl groups, where looks are more important than talent?

If so, its a sad future for women in pop. Its a sad future for women everywhere. Will we ever be 'perfect' enough?